Coping with travel anxiety

I wrote this post the night before flying and also whilst on the plane, therefore I hope that by writing this as I'm trying to manage my own travel anxiety the tips and advice I have to offer will subsequently be of good use to you too. So sit back, relax and enjoy- don't you just hate it when they say that?!

Copyright: Sian Wootton

I'm lying here writing this waiting, trying to remain calm, trying to ignore that nagging in the pit of my stomach and creeping over my skin. Just trying to keep myself calm ready to travel tomorrow. I have suffered from travel anxiety for a good while now. Getting on a plane fills me with a sense of dread. I was fine for a short while after I started to fly again (I wouldn't do it for a few years) but then one bad patch of turbulence and a panic attack set it right back off again. It's funny because I can sit by the window and look out, especially during take off and landing. It actually fills me with awe every time, seeing the world from above, watching cars move along the roads and when you are above the clouds just looking at such a serene view of fluffy white clouds. 

Fear of flying or travel is incredibley common, however it can stem from so many different root causes. For some it's the fear of not being in control. And I hold my hands up to that one. It's got slightly better as I've had to relinquish a lot of control to my illness and being used to not having the last say but prior to that I very much liked to be in control. A lot of people will tell you at this point that it's much safer than driving a car, however to the person that likes being in control, if they are driving they have the control, the decisions are on them and they can see what's going on. Now I for one would not like to pilot a plane but getting on a plane the fact you can't see where you are going can be a big deal. Especially during turbulence, you can't see those bumps in the air, like you would a pot hole and try to avoid it. But we do have to trust that these pilots are highly experienced and will do their upmost to make your flight as comfortable as possible. And apparently turbulence is perfectly safe.

For others the biggest fear is claustrophobia or fear of heights. Or it is as all consuming as being scared something bad will happen. I know a lot of people think about what they would leave behind should something happen. Getting on a plane confronts us with our fears yet many of us try to cope and deal with them the best that we can in order to enjoy seeing the world and go on holiday. We see it as a necessary evil. Although some simply don't put themselves in that position, and forgo flying all together. In all honesty I can't say I blame them, it's something I've thought about many times. Indeed I did for a while. However in order to begin to face our fears and try to find a way to cope it can be worthwhile to pinpoint exactly where your fear stems from. Get to the root cause of the issue.

Personally as well as having that need to be in control I think it has to do with long standing travel sickness issue. Many a car ride has made me green around the gills and I've never been able to cope with a fairground ride wilder than the carousel. So when I know I have to get on a plane I instinctively think this is going to make me unwell. As someone that is chronically ill and ill enough, feeling more sick makes me nervous. I hate vomit. Being physically sick scares me. I can't even stand listening to someone wretching, it gives me cold sweats. I won't even start on my 14 year battle with IBS. Again leading me down that 'I don't have control' route. And what's worse than when you feel like you're not in control if your bodily functions? Sorry TMI.

This is why when I fly I like to be extra prepared and know that I have everything I need to help me cope should I begin to panic. So below I will list a few of the things I do and the items I pack in my hand luggage that help me to at least attempt to be calm.

* Book a flight time that suits you. I like to fly early so that it's over with and I don't spend most of the day getting more and more worked up. Where as if I fly early I get up and go (not that I have much of that.) Also I've heard that flying early is when the air has less disruptions so you will hopefully experience less turbulence.

* Pick your seat carefully- Of course the main question is aisle or window? But also think carefully about where on the plane you would prefer to sit. If you can book a seat in the middle of the plane as this is the centre of gravity of the plane and by sitting by the wing it is the most balanced part of the plane, so you feel less bumps. Or if you are claustrophobic opt for a seat with extra leg room.

* I find guided meditation, mindfulness excercises and relaxing music really helpful. It's good to zone into and tune out of the panic of your current surroundings. If you know this works for you be sure to download them onto your mobile or ipod for use throughout your journey. By downloading them onto a phone or any handheld device it also means you can listen to them throughout take off and landing if you find those parts the most stressful.

* If you have never tried guided meditation, mindfulness or relaxing music, why not give it a try a few weeks before you fly. See if it helps you to feel calmer and zone out. Find one that works for you. Make sure that with any guided meditation or mindfulness that you find the person's voice soothing. There are some that might grate on you and that's not want you want when you are trying to remain calm. Also some soothing music you might find irritating. The sound of a waterfall might not be what you want to hear when you're confined to a plane seat. And some white noise sounds sound too much like rushes of air, again the last thing you want to hear. So experiment with what is good for you.

* I really recommend checking that you can listen to your playlist or any apps you have downloaded in aeroplane mode. I thought I could as I pay for spotify to listen offline for the very purpose of travelling. Yet here I am sat on the plane (Hi from just above Dubrovnik) and it won't let me play it. So test it out. I think the issue I was logged into Spotify through Facebook, which of course requires being online, not through spotify.

* Another option you may like to try to help you zone out is an audio book. I've recently been testing Audible to see how I got on with it. Apart from it being a bit wierd at first having someone else read a story in your head and it not being your own voice, and also falling asleep and missing half the story I thought it would be a great idea to help me manage during the flight. And I have to say here I am up in the air (Hi from somewhere over the Ionian sea) and I've found it really useful. Download a book that will keep you entertained, engaged but that doesn't have too complicated a plot that should you panic you can't follow the story. As well as any other aircraft noise.  I recommend listening to a sample before you purchase, as again you may not like the voice of the narrator. Having a voice like Mummy Pig from Peppa Pig is a bit wierd to be honest.

* Pack a grab bag. This is one of the most important things I pack. As well as my main hand luggage I pack a smaller clutch bag to have by my side or in the pocket in front of your seat, if there is one. I've learnt that when I start to panic the last thing I need is to be reaching down, trying to grab my bag and find things just makes me panic even more. As well as makes me feel dizzier. However if I have them by my side and easily accessible, I can reach for them as soon as I need them without the faff. Even the thought of knowing it's there is reassuring. So what do I pack in my grab bag?

Copyright: Sian Wootton

1. Face wipes- I use these to help cool me down. When I start to panic I start to feel really hot, especially my face so having these is great to dab at my face like an Victorian woman having an attack of the nerves. 

2. Medication- In particular the tablets I need for the duration of the flight. Put any medication you might need throughout the flight in a little pot or dispenser so that it's easily accessible. That's what the little macaron you can see in the photo is. You may need your regular medication or have pain killers, anti sickness or anti anxiety meds handy just in case.

3. Lavendar roller ball- Although this has to be added after security with it being a liquid. I like to put a little bit of this on the inside of my wrists and inhale if I need to relax. If I get a headache or sore sinuses during the flight, which can easily happen due to the change in air pressure I roll some over my forehead and behind my ears.

4. Sweets and mints- A must for helping your ears cope during take off and landing. Mints can also be good for if you are feeling a bit nauseous. You may also want to try ginger drops.

5. Head phones- For listening to anything you've downloaded to help you relax or keep you entertained. Choose ones that are comfortable. I had inner ear ones as I found the new ones that came with my S6 really comfy, however after 2 hours my ears were quite sore. I think the pressure in my ears meant they became more uncomfortable. If you really want to drown out any other noises, especially if they freak you out, opt for noise cancelling ones. They might be expensive but worth it for the peace. Try to get ones that don't press on your ears but envelop them comfortably.

6. Phone- Simple really, for all your entertainment, relaxation and obligatory plane wing shots.

7. Travel bands- These aren't in my bag long as I put them on as soon as I'm in my seat. I use these to help me manage my travel sickness. Whether they're a placebo or not they have certainly helped me over the years. I even pop them on at home on days where I feel really nauseous.

If you feel travel sick looking out at the horizon can help you feel more balanced. Wearing sunglasses can also be helpful as when you stop looking out the window you can feel a bit dizzy from the change in the light. It's bright above them there clouds. Don't do anything that involves having your head down, like reading, as this will cause you too feel more nauseous. If you feel panicky or nauseous during turbulence don't look at the wings, watching them bounce will only increase your panic. Shut the window blind and focus straight ahead.

The day before lay out anything you will need for the day of travelling. Such as the outfit you plan to wear and toiletries you will need to use. Plus anything you will need to pack at the last minute.

Create a list of the items you need to pack last minute as well as anything else you need to do before you leave. For example lock all doors and windows, and checking one last time if you have your passport. Tick them off your list as you do them for that extra bit of peace of mind. Trying to remember if you have locked the front door because you were in such a flurry will cause more anxiety.

Before you leave check the live departure boards online to see whether your flight is on time. If there is a delay ring your airline for advise.

Be organized about how you are getting to the airport. Prebook a taxi etc. Don't wait until the day. The less stress surrounding the journey there the better. So opt for what works best for you. Would you rather the distraction of driving or would that cause more stress? Remember to check traffic conditions before you set off so that you can be prepared for them.

Finally I'm going to suggest some YouTube videos that are good for helping put your mind at ease before flying.

Watch "Fear of flying help video by Virgin Flying Without Fear on YouTube  https://youtu.be/ayXvS5b9jVE

Watch "Air Turbulence Tips" on YouTube https://youtu.be/7Gao3SIT3IY

Watch "Working Through Travel Anxiety // My Experience +…" on YouTube https://youtu.be/sgGMN8f6Hs4

I hope that you have found some of these tips useful and they help you to cope with your next flight. Please share your tips too, as I would love to know what helps you.

Sian x

  

The legacy of mental illness: Are you okay?

Firstly, apologies for the sporadic blogging of late. As you will know I've been busy campaigning with Team Princess and that took a lot of brain power so lately my head has been a bit spaced out. Just today I tried to bring up the app screen on a bar of chocolate. Maybe I shouldn't admit this on a post where I'm writing about convincing everyone my mental health is fine but oh how I laughed at myself. On a good note while my brain is fuzzy, on days where my health has allowed all my energy has gone into living life to the fullest that I possibly can. More on that in the next post. So I hope you'll forgive the absense. I hope to be back to a blogging schedule soon, because I do miss it. Anyway on with the post....

When you have suffered from a mental illness in the past the chances are you will feel haunted by it long past your recovery. Some how no matter how positive, happy and confident you become there is often a nagging in the back of your mind "remember me? This could happen again." And for all we know it could happen again. An addict will always be considered suseptible to weakness and retriggering a habit and so they learn to avoid temptation as much as they possibly can. However with mental illness, even those that were triggered by addiction, it's very hard to avoid circumstances that could lead you to be more suseptible again. As they say, you can't stop life from happening. Avoidance stratergies for non addicts is futile to a full recovery, because you are still living in fear and not fully overcome the issues that bought on your condition. However of course the more we open ourselves up to the world the more of a chance we may feel we have of giving all those past feelings a green light to come interupt us once more.

There is also the prejudice of having a history of mental illness on your medical records. Sometimes doctors will see that and focus too much on it. Even if your symptoms are physical and years could have passed since you have suffered. When I was admitted to hospital after collapsing and being pretty much asleep for 3 days back when M.E hit me, because it was relatively close to my serious bout of depression where I had gone to A&E a couple of times or been sent for psychiatric evaluations at the hospital (yes I know that sounds bad but it really isn't when you desperately want help) they could obviously see this on my recent medical notes. Because of this once they had ruled out things like meningitis they began suspecting it was of my own accord, that I had overdosed or drank myself into oblivion, or just shut myself off from the world. I had been to a Summer ball the night before I collapsed, so of course this lead them to believe the former even more. Even though I didn't have any alcohol or drugs either for that matter so they could obviously see that in my blood work. It also helps that the junior doctor actually knows the difference between 2 paracetemol for the pain in your neck and enough paracetemol for an overdose, rolls eyes. I had to be asssessed by a psychiatrist again, although all I needed to say was I was not suicidal that I had been having the time of my life then bam my physical health knocks me down. Luckily that was it and he probably felt like they had wasted his time. No matter what you say though, because that is on your records they are going to ask about it. It's going to be a line on enquiry, or possible diagnosis until they have more answers. And that can feel really unfair. It can be upsetting because you feel scared and overwhelmed by these physical symptoms and those you go to for help will in part think it's all in your head. To be fair they have not seen the progress you have made, or how happy you have been, but it still feels like a kick in the teeth. You want to shout " you know why I'm doing okay now? Because as you can see from my records I sought help."

I know that I have all the tools and tricks to lead a positive life now that I consider myself to be recovered. Making sure that I choose to be positive as much as I can and make opportunities happen. Not bottleing things up and being open about my feelings. However I also know that depression can take control even as I fight to keep it a distant memory and that's not because I'm personally not strong enough, because in all honesty I think I am. It's our brains chemistry. My most serious bout of depression and anxiety took me at a time where I should have felt elated. I couldn't really understand how it was happening. And that in itself is a scary thought. To not have control of everything that goes on in your head. Therefore I know all too well that these conditions can creep up at any time and that I am not unsuseptible to their power. However having suffered in the past as well as knowing that that is a part of me and one that has left it's scars, I also know the warning signs and symptoms to look out for and be able to get help much quicker should I need to. Most importantly I know that I have overcome this before, that I had the strength to do so and that that strength has improved every day that I live depression and anxiety free. I feel that should I ever suffer in that way again, and there's always that chance, that I could handle it. Of course if it does happen I don't really know how I will respond but knowing that until that time, should it happen again, I feel I could cope and come out the other side stronger is a great safety net. 

We never know what is going to happen in life and therefore we really don't know how we will react in certain situations that may crop up in our future. Of course sadness is part of life. It may or may not lead to depression. But we can't live in fear of feeling emotions and sadness in particular, because we need to experience release. Avoiding those feelings will potentially cause more chance of us being suseptible. Having feelings is no bad thing.  

So I would like to say that yes I have a history of mental illness. It took over my life in a way that scared and overwhelmed me. But how am I now? Honestly, stronger and happier than ever. I know how to keep myself in check and all the warning signs I should look out for. As well as what to do should they arise. I know that it's ok to feel sad, frustrated or hard done by, especially as I have a chronic illness that has left me predominantly housebound. I worried when I was first diagnosed with M.E that I would be a sitting duck for depression. I even visited my local Mind and booked an appointment with my former councellor. But so far so good. 4 years later and I only had that one counselling session to express my anxieties about being diagnosed with a chronic illness and the effect that might have on my mental health. In the last few weeks I've also finally been weaned off my anti depressants. I haven't really needed them for a couple of years but have kept on them due to the interaction of my other medication working well for sleep and pain levels.

So if I tell you I'm not feeling good today generally I mean physically and that is probably an underestimation for feeling absolutely shockingly awful. I don't mean I feel depressed or down. And if I did I would certainly tell you, so that I can get things off my chest. So don't jump to the conclusion that not feeling good means I feel down. Accept that I will tell you if I feel sad or worried. And I will of course seek help if I feel I need it. I know my situation means I could very easily get depressed with living with a chronic illness. However, I let myself get angry and upset when I need to, allowing myself to vent. It might seem mad to actually say I'm happy, happier and more confident than I have ever felt but it's true. And I am so very grateful for that. I really do not want to experience what I did again but if I ever do please ask me if I am okay and please listen to my anwers. I promise I'll be honest and I promise I'll get help.

Sian X

January blues: Crisis Teams

 

Ok it's technically not January anymore but I've been working on this post for a while and it follows on from my last post on accessing urgent help. Actually I have a few more mental health posts in various draughts but I am planning to publish them in May now, as part of mental health awareness month. As I want to start a new mini series for this month (details coming soon.)

I think the fear with having a mental health crisis (as defined in my previous post) is that you will end up locked away and sectioned under the mental health act. And while some people will, the shortage of beds and the advance of more community based care means there are more options available. The decision to section a patient is a serious one and there are strict procedures in place to do so. And in act the majority of patients at inpatient facilities for mental illnesses are not sectioned and are there voluntarily. And likewise with people in eating disorder units only some will be sectioned.

However in most cases there are other options available. In this post I'm going to be talking about an option that is available for care and treatment for those more severely affected by their mental health.

If you have sought support through you're GP or seen a psychiatrist following a trip to A&E in a crisis then they may make a referral for a community or crisis team.

Crisis teams or home treatment teams as they are also called (there are also other names depending on your area) are designed to help patients in crisis without them being admitted to a psychiatric unit. They often refer to themselves as a ward within the community. And offer treatment to patients within their own home. Meaning that patients can live in their own comfortable and familiar surroundings (where it is safe for them to do so) but still receive all the benefits of regular contact and treatment. This can be daily or every other day or even once a week depending on the level of support you need. Every area should have a crisis team or home treatment team. And they can be accessed through referral by your GP or hospital after an assessment. Or you may be referred to them as part of your intergration after being in a mental health unit.

Following an assessment by the crisis team you will be allocated a mental health nurse or team who will be familiar with your case. On your first visit, or on other visits, you may also be seen by a psychiatrist, especially for medication reviews or to be prescribed any new medication.

Together with the team you will develop a care plan to help you overcome your crisis; in which you identify the key areas in which you need help in order to function more normally again and manage your day to day life. This can include medication, relaxation techniques, CBT, distraction techniques, ways of controlling anxiety and self harm. As well as who to contact if you are in desperate need of help.

Depending on your situation they can also help with more specific problems that have arisen due to your mental health and help you to access services that could be beneficial. These could be help for mental health problems as a result of alcholism or drug abuse. But also more basic needs too. MIND have produced the following list of examples:

managing money, such as budgeting or paying the bills

housework, such as cleaning, cooking or shopping

using local services, such as peer support groups, employment services, or day centres

transport, such as using a taxi, minibus or bus pass to attend appointments or services

managing relationships, such as relationships with friends, family or neighbours

aids and adaptations to your home or help with mobility issues

personal care, such as washing or dressing

benefits and housing, such as help with applications, attending appointments or getting advice or information

accessing or staying in training, education or employment

support from a specialist social worker or support worker

For cases of social anxiety your team can help you intergrate and manage social situations. This may be through exposure therapy; taking you out and helping you to put into practice coping stratergies you develop with your team, whilst having the safety of a team to help you through it.

At times with this care you have to be prepared to put in a lot of effort and hard work in order to help yourself to get better. And it can be frustrating. However it is an investment in your health and wellbeing and you deserve to find that peace. For more information about crisis teams and the role they play visit MIND's dedicated page. You can also find out what services are available in your area through your GP, council website or local MIND service.

I hope that this series of posts has been beneficial to either yourself or someone that you care about and if not now, then perhaps it will in the future. Mental illness can be a very lonely place, and one that it can be very hard to recognise that you need help, or even to physically form the words to ask for it and try and put the whirlwind of thoughts into logical sentences. Recognising that you need help is a huge step forward, and one that can be difficult to take. However in doing so you are opening yourself up to the world of help that is out there. Help that you probably didn't know about. Take it, use it and regain yourself in the process. 

Like I said I will be reposting more mental health related posts in May. If you have any suggestions for posts you would like to see, or would like to share your story through a guest blog post then please get in touch.

Take care everyone

Sian

January Blues: I need help now!

 

So far this series has looked at identifying depression and anxiety, knowing where to get help and the types of help that are available. Mainly concentrating on depression or anxiety in relation to a life changing event and depression that you may struggle to identify a cause for. Most of the information has been in relation to the onset of the illness and relatively mild to moderate in severity.

Today I want to talk about mental health crisises. How to recognise that you are in crisis; and where you can access help.

 

How to recognise that you are in crisis:

A crisis can occur whether you have previously been diagnosed with depression or other mental illness such as bipolar, schitzophrenia or obsessive compulsive disorder. Or it may well come out of the blue and you were otherwise previously healthy as the first episode of a mental illness.

MIND the charity says that Mental health crises include:

 

suicidal behaviour or intention

 

panic attacks/extreme anxiety

 

psychotic episodes (loss of sense of reality, hallucinations, hearing voices)

 

other behaviour that seems out of control or irrational and that is likely to endanger yourself or others.

 

In a mental health crisis help is needed more urgently. However where as the majority of us know what to do in a physical emergency most of us wouldn't know where to get help if we or someone else is in serious mental distress. And the NHS infographics, such as the one below, don't cover mental health either.

 

Please note the above photo mentions NHS Direct which has since been replaced by 111. You can read more about this new service below.

 

Helplines

 

I know I have mentioned helplines in most of the posts in this series but that's because they have a real role to play and are recommended by doctors and mental health charities. If the crisis is a part of an ongoing problem you may already be receiving care from a crisis team (which I will talk more about in my next post) and have numbers to ring for those directly responsible for your care. However if it falls out of those contact hours or you do not currently recieve crisis care the best helpline and one that is manned 24/7 is The Samaritans. Contact them on 08457 90 90 90 

 

Your GP or Out of Hours

 

During the day you may be able to contact your GP surgery for an emergency appointment or phone call consultation. However this might not be guaranteed and you might have to wait longer than you feel you can. In which case the receptionist might be able to advise you where to go.

Outside of surgery hours you can contact your nearest out of hours service for an appointment.

I would say both above situations might be most beneficial in slightly less of a crisis, where you are worried but can wait longer. For example you might have self harmed and feeling a bit calmer but still want to report it and get extra help. As long as you can stop any bleeding. If however it is more severe or you have a more serious injury or burns then seek more immediate help, such as those listed below.

 

Dial 111

 

111 is the new service that replaced NHS Direct. It is to be used in more urgent circumstances where you cannot access your GP but where the situation is not presumed life threatening. In which case of course you would ring 999. They can also inform you of what action to take and where you can access the level of help that you need based on the information that you present them with. Whether it be for yourself or if you need to take action on behalf of someone else. From there they can  make direct appointments for you or put you through to more specialist services such as A&E, out-of-hours doctors (and others depending on the case.) In some cases they can also send for an ambulance.

 

Ring 999

 

If you have seriously harmed (bleeding profusely or severe burns) yourself through self harm, injury or overdose or come across someone that is unconscious or unresponsive as a result of their actions then dial for an ambulance.

 

Go to A&E

 

Going back to those NHS info graphics they are designed to help stop unnecessary use of accident and emergency services because there are too many patients attending that could have been treated elsewhere, which in turn reduces waiting times and how quickly those in real need get treated. However like I mentioned they only cover physical health. Just like you would a physical emergency going to A&E if you are experiencing a mental health crisis is a real option and Accident and Emergency units do have policies and procedures in place for patients that present with the symptoms of a mental health crisis. In some cases if you have previously sought help from a doctor or NHS 111 they might even have told you to go to A&E. Go to A&E if you are also in need of physical treatment as a result of your mental state, such as deep self harm, injury or overdose.

 

There they will assess you and sometimes check for any infections that might be causing any symptoms (such as hallucinations) through a blood test and urine test. As well as treating any physical symptoms if you have any. If you're symptoms are beinv made worse by the waiting room environment (which are never easy to cope with anyway) ask if you can wait somewhere quieter. In some cases they will do this automatically. They will also keep a note of your clothing and physical description for security purposes. Should anyone in severe crisis leave the department. You should also be assessed by the psychiatrist on call, alongside a mental health nurse. Unfortunately crisis care at A&E can vary. Sometimes depending on how busy they are. I always used the same one but the experience differed on each ocassion. Ideally you should be treated as stated above. Put in a safe place and treated with compassion and understanding. You can be waiting a long time too to see a psychistrist depending on the time of day and how much other work they have with inpatients etc. But know that you are entitled to be assessed by a psychiatrist and that you have every right to be there. Even if you have no physical injury. Knowing your rights and where to get the help you need is really important

 

I remember during the times that I was in crisis and although the thoughts to do harm were overwhelming, on most occasions there was also a real fear. I was just so scared of these feelings. Personally, I saw that fear as a ray of hope, which might sound strange, but I kept telling myself that as long as that fear was there it meant that a part of me was fighting back; saying get yourself some help, get yourself 'somewhere' safe. However I also know that that fear also escalated those feelings of anxiety making my symptoms even worse. Panicking that I would totally lose control. But I am glad that through that I could say "I need help, now!" In hindsight I can see that the really scary times were those of total clarity and intention. The actual planning of 'I am going to harm myself.'

 

If you ever feel like that or come across someone that does then I hope this post has helped inform you of what you can do.

 

In my next post I'll talk about what care options are available for more severe cases.

 

Sian

January Blues: What help is available?

 

In my previous post on where to get help if you think you may have depression I referred to a questionnaire that your GP should supply you in order to form an assessment of how much depression is affecting you. You can see an online copy of the questionnaire here http://www.nhs.uk/Tools/Pages/depression.aspx  It is important that you fill it out honestly and that you can provide as much other information as possible in order for your GP to suggest treatments they feel will most help you.

 

Possible Treatments

 

See how it goes:

If your depression is relatively mild then after your initial talk with your GP you may feel a bit more empowered and much lighter for having got things off your chest. If this is the case then make a follow up appointment for a week or two to see if this continues. But remember if you continue to feel worse then go back to see them sooner. Furthermore speak to someone that you can trust and open up to regularly. Also remember if you are feeling at the end of your tether with it all then seeing how it goes might to you sound like a cop out. In which case work with your doctor to come up with a more proactive care plan.

 

Self care:

 

Your GP may also write you a book prescription for a self help book about depression/ anxiety that they recommend. You simply take the prescription to your local library and they get a copy of that book for you to lend for a few weeks. It doesn't matter if you are a member of that library or not. You may find it difficult at times to  concentrate but take it bit by bit. Alternatively they could recommend good websites to use that have detailed and useful information. Sometimes just knowing you are being that bit more pro active can lift your mood slightly.

Other tips that may help you is to try and see a bit more day light and get more fresh air. To do gentle excercise. Eat more healthy foods. Even just pampering yourself a bit. Having a bubble bath, putting on a face mask or painting your nails. Listening to your favourite songs or watching your favourite tv show or film. Many a counsellor will tell you to avoid the news and soap operas as they can often make you feel worse. They might sound trivial but they can work to help boost your self esteem and also as a distraction technique, to prevent you thinking as much about your troubles. I would also recommend keeping a diary to help you rate your mood and to notice if anything helps to improve your mood. Even if you simply write:

 

Mood before activity (going for a walk):
Mood after activity:

 

Assigning your mood a number. 1 being the lowest mood imagineable and 10 being the best mood.

 

Talking Therapy:

 

As mentioned in my former post counselling is one of the most recommended forms of treatment available for all kinds of patient and problems. It can help you to gain perspective and to make you feel that you are not alone in dealing with your emotions, feelings and problems. You may benefit from talking to a friend or family member however the added advantage of receiving counselling is that you can talk to someone who is trained to listen and have specific advice to help you cope with this difficult time. Plus, because they don't know you they do not have any preconceptions of you nor pass any judgement. Usually counselling is one on one but there is also the options of relationship counselling, family counselling and group therapy depending on your needs. I spoke in more detail on what types of counselling are available and where you can find counselling that is right for you in my previous post (linked above).

 

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy

 

Or CBT as it is known, whilst controversial for it's choice as a treatment for physical illnesses, can be an effective treatment for mental health problems. It may be used alongside counselling or often combined with it in each session. It is a way of analysising the way in which you think about things and how we form patterns of thought. It looks at ways to prevent some thought patterns that lead to feelings of depression and anxiety from occurring.

 

For example I found CBT extremely useful in helping me to stop negative thoughts from escalating into depression or anxiety and panic and each time it did I would automatically think about self harming. So through using CBT in my counselling sessions and other help I recieved I was able to identify triggers to these feelings and with time learn to rechannel those thoughts. And I can honestly say now, 5 years later I'm still very grateful for each time I can feel down in the dumps or alone etc etc and not have thoughts of self harm. So I think this is a good treatment for anyone that as a consequence of their feelings wants to harm themselves (or others) in anyway be it through cutting to starving yourself. Obviously the greater the feeling to do harm is CBT may only be part of a treatment plan and combined with other treatments.

 

It is also a good treatment for anyone that is having real difficulty in coping with change in their lives. Be it feeling lost after retiring to having to cope with being diagnosed with a long term illness. It won't improve the symptoms of a physical illness but it may help you to have the strength to adjust to having your life uprouted. For example if you feel that as a result of your illness that your life no longer has meaning. In some ways I think had I not learned to have greater control of my thoughts (even though it was a while before being diagnosed with M.E) I would struggle more emotionally and be at greater risk or relapasing into depression.

 

Medication

 

Many people have opposing views on the use of medications such as antidepressants and benzodiapozines (such as xanax and diazapam) to treat depression or anxiety. Some will say they disliked them, that they gave them a false sense of reality and simply masked their emotions; leaving the feelings unresolved and likely to return. While others, myself included, will say that they were a big help in winning back the emotional fight. That they help calm things down so that you can deal with the emotions and any triggers that you identify through talking therapies. Either way using talking therapies too will allow you to deal with any triggers to the way you are feeling that antidepressants alone can't solve. Of course it is entirely your own choice if you want to go down that route. And I do not wish to influence anyones choice as everyone is different.

 

It's a decision that should be made solely between you and your doctor. You might be worried that by taking antidepressants your problems seem to be much more frightening. A kind of "well I must be really bad if I need loony pills". Or you may be scared in case someone sees you taking this medication and will therefore associate you with being mad. Another fear may be that you are worried about the side effects, which some patients may experience. However each patient will react in different ways. The same goes with fear of the withdrawal process, which can cause it's own problems. It can be helpful to reassure yourself that it is your body readjusting to less chemicals and not be filled with fear that you are adjusting. Be sure to thoroughly discuss likely side effects with your doctor so that you can be fully aware of what to expect. And when the time comes that you feel you could cope without them your doctor will advise you on how to do so gradually and safely. But be aware that it may take some time. It could even be years in some cases (I'm still on a low dosage, 5 years later.) And if you want to make the decision about proceeding with medication at a later date then it's up to you.

 

Types of medication

 

There are several types of antidepressants. However they are all designed to act on the same brain chemicals. I won't go in to chemical speak but basically they work on prolonging serotonin, the chemical associated with good mood, as people suffering from depression can have low levels. These are known as SSRIs. More modern antidepressants also work on norepinephrine another chemical that is responsible for energy and alertness. These are known as SNRIs. These may also have less side effects.

 

Tricyclic and tricyclic-related antidepressants were invented in the 1950s and work by prolonging the action of seratonin as well as noradrenaline in the brain. These can cause a few more side effects.

There are also Monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs) however these are less common, mainly after other types of antidepressants have been tried and are only prescribed by specialists.

 

Benzodiazepines are sometimes used to help manage anxiety, panic attacks and obsessive compulsive disorders and sometimes during alcohol withdrawal. They work on the chemical in the brain that helps us to feel calm and to help the cells pass on the message that we are not in any danger, that has been triggered with an anxiety or panic attack. However they will only ever be prescribed for short term use due to their association with addiction.Also because they do not help with the route cause of anxiety nor help you to feel better in the long term. They're only effective for a short time when your body is at peak distress. Other treatments such as counselling, CBT or antidepressants will be recommended as more effective ways to stop the anxiety from building and help you cope more long term.

 

Other Treatments

 

Arts therapies

 

Arts therapy is a less intrusive more complimentary treatment. And is designed to allow people that have difficulty in expressing their feelings to do so in a different way. It is often used when treating children, for example to help them come to terms with grief or divorce. It can be useful with this age group due to them not having the learned the right words to express how they feel or how to process the new information. But can also be effective for people of any age. Different art forms such as   music, art, dance or drama can be utilised to help the sufferer to express their feelings in a way that does not feel like therapy. Each session will be run by a trained therapist who will help you to interpret your work and be there if you want to talk about the emotions it has conjured up. Your GP, specialist, counsellor or local MIND centre should be able to tell you where you you can locally access this kind of therapy.

Alternative medicine

 

Depending on your beliefs you may wish to try alternative medicine or treatment. It will also depend on the GP that you are with what information they have about this. Some way have recommendations and others won't because it doesn't necessarily fall within their remit. However like with anything you undertake be sure to know how it will impact you and whether it will interfere with any medication you take. Just because something is natural or alternative does not mean it won't give you side effects (again it differs with each case). I would recommend that anything you do try you disclose to your doctor as a way to regulate how the treatment is going. Also remember that you will need to pay for any medication or treatment yourself.

 

The treatments I have mentioned here are for relatively moderate depression or anxiety. If your condition becomes worse or you become more at risk of doing harm to yourself then there are further options available. Also if you are diagnosed with another type of mental illness such as bipolar disorder, paranoid schitzophrenia or Obsessive Compulsuve Disorder then more specialized help is available. But in the most instances most depression or anxiety patients will be treated with one or a combination of the above treatments and will find them effective. And if any time you feel you are getting worse or experience nasty side effects then be sure to get back to your doctor as soon as you can.

 

Of course what is important to remember is there are no quick fixes, getting better will take time. And that may be incredibley frustrating at times. Try to have patience and think that each day is a step in the right direction. Think of it like a physical illness or injury if needs be. If you broke your leg or had appendicitis you would need at least 6 weeks to be heeled again. Having a mental health problem is no less real and the mind is a much more complex place.

 

Sian

 

* The information contained within this blog post is for self education purposes and should only be used in conjunction with that of a doctor that understands your personal circumstances.  All information in this blog post has been researched from MIND's website and the NHS website. With some personal experience. Please note that every patient is different  and all medical choices are best decided between you and your medical professional. I do not wish to influence anyone's choices, as it is down to each individual. This post only stands to point out what help is available out there.

January Blues: Where can I get help?

 

Firstly I want to say a very big thank you for all the comments and support I've received so far about this mini series. I'm glad many of you have appreciated it. This post is going to be a point of reference of sorts, should you ever need the information. Actually the post was getting so long I've had to split it into a few posts. One that's more general (which is this post) and another for more of a crisis situation (which hopefully will be published soon) and a post on what treatment options are available.

 

When you are battling with your mental health the hardest thing it can seem to do is to ask for help. Because it can be really difficult to actually admit that there is something wrong. Especially bad enough for you to need help. And of course the thought of needing help can also fill you with fear. Thinking that if you actually told someone what you are feeling then they may think you're crazy, mental or those horrible names nutjob or psycho. And consequently that you will be locked away and sectioned under the mental health act. However in reality this is very rarely the case.And what you are experiencing is something many others are also going through. 1 in 4 people will experience some kind mental health problem at any one time. So try to reassure your self that you will not be locked away.

 

However when you feel like that asking for help is the biggest step you can take. You may have had people telling you that you need help for some time. And perhaps you dismissed them. However deciding to get help needs to be very much your own want and recognition that you need that help. If you are concerned about a friend or family member there is a specific page on the MIND website for advise http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helping-someone-else/

 

But where do you turn to when you want help? Would you know? Would you know how to help someone else that is suffering or in crisis? Below I have shared some options of where to get help in the early stages.

 

Talk to someone- firstly you might just want to talk to a friend or family member. Think who will understand and will listen without judgement. If there have been people who have been wanting you to seek help then they might be a good place to start. As long as you feel that they will listen and genuinely care about you. It may be that that is all the support you need. Just getting things off your chest and maybe thinking up solutions with a friend can be a big help.

 

Talk to your GP - when you have a mental/ emotional problem you may think that going to the GP is a waste of time. That they can only help for physical problems. However, in truth GP's see a large number of people with mental health issues each day. One GP once told me (after I had said that I felt that I was wasting his time) that it was actually about 80% of his job. That being said you need the right GP. One that you feel comfortable with and one who you feel actually really listens to you. Those 2 factors are very important. So if you feel uncomfortable with a certain GP or that they haven't treated you with compassion then ask to see another GP in your surgery. Do not let a bad experience affect your right to be listened to and to get the help that you need. And if you burst out crying in there don't worry about it. They should get you to complete a questionnaire that they can use to assess how you're mental health is, you can find an online copy of it here http://www.nhs.uk/Tools/Pages/depression.aspx Fill it out honestly. That way they can help you on a course of treatment that is right for you. I am preparing a separate post on what help and treatments are available.

 

Counselling- Counselling is one of the course of treatments that could be suggested for you. But as it is not exclusive to needing to see your GP first I wanted to mention it in this post. Counselling on the NHS can have long waiting lists due to the high amount of people that need it. The NHS are trying to put more counsellors into GP surgeries to reduce waiting times for this much needed service but wait times can still be long. Especially for a service where the sooner the better. However if you feel you cannot wait that long then there are other options available.

If you are employed then your employer may be able to get you a counsellor through occupational health. And this in no way should affect your standing at work or make you feel less employable. It is a service they can provide to look after the wellbeing of their staff. So if you are experiencing any problems, even ones that are not work related, then ask your boss if an appointment can be made for you. You don't have to tell them the reason either unless you feel you want to.

If you wish to see a private counsellor then you will need to pay.As with most service providers nowadays a simple search on Google can tell you where there are local counsellor's in your area. Along with a pinpoint to their location and contact details. I simply typed in "where can I find a counsellor?" and a list of local places came up on my phone.

 

The following site also has a list of directories that you can use:

http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/pages/free-therapy-or-counselling.aspx

 

And there is also:
Www.counselling-directory.org.uk

 

Charities

 

Mental health charities do such a fantastic job for raising awareness of mental health issues and also offering services to help sufferers.

 

MIND

 

MIND is a mental health charity that not only is an organization that fights for the rights of those with mental illness but also has thousands of branches across the UK. Each branch offers a number of services available to each community. On the link below you can see what services they offer in your area. Some even offer free counselling, which can sometimes be accessed sooner than through your GP surgury.

http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/local-minds/

 

Other services include:

 

supported housing
crisis helplines
drop-in centres
employment and training schemes befriending

 

You can seek lots of information about different conditions and issues surrounding mental health on their website www.mind.org.uk or their infoline 0300 123 3393 or text 86463 or email info@mind.org.uk 

 

Other charities and organizations that offer specific help for different issues or clearer groups of society are:

 

Calm (Campaign against living miserabley)

 

Free support and information for young men in the UK between the ages of 15-35
0800 585858
www.thecalmzone.net

 

Women's Aid

 

Is a charity for women and children experiencing domestic abuse.
0808 2000 247
www.womensaid.org.uk

 

Cruse Bereavement Care

 

Offers specific support to anyone following the death of a loved one.
0844 477 9400
www.cruse.org.uk

 

B-eat (Beating Eating Disorders)

 

Offers advise and information on eating disorders.
0845 6341414
Youth line 0845 6347650
www.b-eat.co.uk

 

Headway

 

Offers support and advise to anyone affected by brain injury.
0808 800 2244
www.headway.org.uk

 

Relate

 

For advise and counselling for any type of relationship and the problems that can occur within them. They have centres around the country. Visit their website for all services they offer.
0300 100 1234
www.relate.org.uk

 

Helplines and other contacts

 

When you are in distress phoning a helpline can be useful. Your GP or your local MIND centre will have access to local helplines. However these might have limited hours. If you are in a more desperate need to talk to someone, then The Samaritans is a 24/7 service. Their helpline is 08457 90 90 90 or if you don't feel up to using the phone you can also email them jo@samaritans.org More information can also be found on their website www.samaritans.org 

 

In my next post I will be talking about what types of treatments are available for moderate depression and anxiety. Then a post on where to get help in more of a crisis situation.

 

Sian

January Blues: Why do I feel so bad?

 

When you feel so down and depressed or anxious and panicky it's only natural you will ask yourself "why?" Why do I feel like this? And a lot of the time the answer will be "I don't know".  Which will frustrate you all the more. It's frustrating because your logical brain is screaming "but there must be a reason!" But all you can do is cry "I don't know" some more. And this might be the case for a while.

If your symptoms are a reaction to an event, such as losing a family member or friend, a relationship breaking up or losing your job, then that can be reasoned. It's in no way easy but at least you can say "I feel this way because..." . You have a clearer idea about why you feel as you do that can be worked on to help you start to feel better.

 

There are many different forms of depression that can stem from an event, or time of year such as:

 

* postnatal depression
* grief
* post traumatic stress disorder
* seasonal affective disorder

 

All of which can seriously affect your mental health and are recognised conditions, that some form of treatment can be sought. I will get on to treatment in another post but know that they're is help that you can get for these conditions if they are having a more chronic affect on you.

 

 

However in many cases people can really struggle to find a logical and explainable reason that they feel so bleak. Made worse by feeling numb and empty. Really not knowing what is the matter at all. Only that you feel so hopeless and shut down and even the simplest of things like getting out of bed or getting dressed feel unachievable. And this can lead to thinking it's all your fault you feel that way or even that you deserve to feel as you do. Well, you don't. Furthermore you may feel that you must be a bad person; that you must have done something wrong. Which in all likelihood is also false. Only the darkness inside of you will have you convinced otherwise.

 

What can be even more difficult to comprehend is if you feel depressed at a time in your life when you are 'supposed' to feel happy. For example my own experience of feeling depressed when I graduated from university, which you can read about in my introductory post to this mini series. And another story that I often reference is that of Olympic cycling gold medalist Victoria Pendleton, who was self harming even on the night she won her Olympic gold medal; an achievement she had worked so hard for years to achieve. But the outside world only sees a projection of ourselves not all the darkness that we are struggling to ward off.

 

 

Most of the time there will be answers as to why we feel as we do, but they can be very deep set. Chances are we're reacting to something. In some cases this could be something from years back. Something that has been locked up for too long and finally needs to come out. Or in some cases (and not wanting to scare anyone) an undiagnosed illness that is affecting our neurology or hormomes. I remember during the time I was at my worst it was found that I had really high levels of prolactin, which although wasn't the main cause of my condition was certainly a factor in making it worse.

Whether you have a clear idea of what is causing your condition or really struggling to find one the best thing that you can do is to seek help. If you have friends or family that understand speak to them. But your gp is a good first point of call, and they will not find your problems trivial (well they shouldn't.) They will be able to suggest a course of action to help you find out what is causing these feelings. My next post is going to be one with more information on where to get help. But if in the mean time you require help do visit your gp or you could ring the MIND helpline on 0300 123 3393 or texr 86463.

 

Sian

January Blues (a mini series)

I have said it a few times in posts but I'm going to say it again I'M HAPPY! In spite of being chronically ill I really am. But there was a time when I wasn't. Really wasn't infact. At the time what was hard to comprehend was the fact that it was a time where I should have been really happy. And there are times when I fear I'll go back there.

To start off this series of posts on mental health issues I thought where better to begin than my own story. I have posted a few times about my past struggles with depression, anxiety, panic attacks and self harm but I want to reitterate some of it for the purposes of this series, to show that this topic actually means a lot to me. It's something that I will carry around with me for the rest of my life. And I'm not the only one. Mental illness of some kind affects 1 in 4 people at any time. Yet how often is it talked about? So let's start talking...

Look at the photo above. What do you see? A young woman on her graduation day. One of the biggest achievements of her life. Well sometimes photographs can be deceiving. I really wasn't sure at the time if I could even attend the gradution ceremony. Wasn't sure I wanted to. Because behind that photo was a woman who was fighting a battle against her own head. A scared shadow of myself and all that that photo should represent. Take off the layers of concealer and you'll see eyes puffy from constant tears. Look at that hair, only clean because my Mum had to wash it for me as I shook so much. Peel back those sleaves and you'll see the fresh cuts and the healing scabs that begged to be itched and scratched. The bare legs that my Mum helped do with an electric razor to stop my brain from feeling temptation.

So no I've not always been happy. I've suffered a few bouts of depression and anxiety since the age of 14. However the period after I left university and graduating was certainly the worst. It's a place I never want to be again. Sometimes I feel that I am running scared from mental illness hoping it will never catch me again. Unfortunately I can't guarantee that. However I'm extremely grateful for every day I have where I'm not battling my own mind. I'm lucky I learnt to control it. Luckily the physical scars are not too visible but the emotional ones will last far longer. I will never forget that time. 

I try to use that experience as a way to try and remain positive now, to be more grateful for what having a healthy mind means. Sometimes I even say to myself that if I can get through that then I can get through anything. Within reason of course. That has been tested a few times during turbulent flights. And of course regularly gets tested during particularly bad health flares or relapses. What's more I've learnt that mental health needs to be talked about more. That it's all too taboo and hush hush, which considering how common it is is ridiculous. And so I try to talk about it when I can in a bid to raise awareness. 

To go back to the graduation photograph to the outside world no one would have guessed what was going on in my head. And it's the same for millions of people. Sometimes though it's important to see behind those masks. To say actually my mental health problem is more real than what my photograph documents. And if I can help just one other person by blogging about my personal experiences and by doing this January Blues series then that's something positive.

If you have any suggestions for topics or conditions that you would like to see covered in this blog series then please do leave a comment. Likewise if you would like to share your story through a guest blog post. To any of you that are suffering or if you know someone that is then I hope this series will help somewhat. 

Sian 

Coping with The Festive Season with depression

 

I recently posted some tips for managing the festive season with a chronic illness, focusing more on physical illness. However as I am a big advocate for supporting mental health issues and making sure it's talked about I wanted to offer some advice for anyone who is suffering with their mental health. Because it really is a time that people can feel an increase in their symptoms.

 

All you see and hear is 'tis the season to be jolly' when you feel far from it. And unfortunately no matter how many times some people will tell you, you cannot just snap out of it.

 

Feeling depressed or anxious but not been formally diagnosed- you've finished work for Christmas and it's been stressful trying to get all your deadlines met on time as well as organizing everything that comes along with Christmas and all of a sudden it all catches up with you. Feeling overwhelmed, stressed and stretched out can lead to feelings of depression or anxiety. Listen to what your body is telling you and your head. Will these feelings pass? Have you actually been masking feelings of sadness for a long time? Or do you feel totally overwhelmed and want to cry all day long? Take a step back evaluate and if you feel you need to, make that decision to get help. That step is the first and most important one.

 

Know where to get help- if you are all ready recieving care or counselling etc then Christmas can mean a break in the continuity of progress. Ask your gp or counsellor what is available if you need that extra support during out of hours times. Just having that information as a back up can be reassuring. They will be able to advise you of any local services or helplines available to you. Or you should be able to pick up a leaflet at your doctors surgery. MIND have a infoline 0300 123 3393 or text 86463 or email info@mind.org.uk. And there is the Samaritans too, contact them on 08457 90 90 90 or email jo@samaritans.org

I have also left links at the end of this post to websites where you can get more information if you think you may be suffering from depression. You can find lots of advice and support on there.

 

Untangle your thoughts- if you are struggling to find a reason as to why you feel so down or even if you have a clear idea why, all these thoughts can become tangled and overwhelming. Leaving you feeling numb. I find a good way to unlock some of the issues that are troubling me is to write down whatever is going through my head at that time. It doesn't have to be ordered or linear. But writing can allow your thoughts to become clearer. Outpouring all your thoughts and feelings onto paper so that they become something you can physically see. It can often feel like a big release too.

 

 

Talk- It's really hard to want to talk when you feel so bad. Or even just finding the words to describe all that's going on in your head. But find someone you trust and love to talk to. Someone who will just LISTEN even if what you're saying doesn't make sense.

 

Do not belittle those feelings or thoughts- you may feel like what you are feeling is not worthy or you don't feel you have the right to feel sad. But depression is not necessarily logical in that way. A story that always resonates with me is that of Olympic gold medal winning cyclist Victoria Pemberton and how she self harmed after winning her gold medal. So even people at their peak can be in a whole world of pain inside their heads.

 

Try not to beat yourself up- okay this is particularly hard when you feel so awful but putting extra pressure on yourself is only going to cause more anxiety. Accept that you will do what you can and go at your own pace. Chances are you are the one putting the most pressure on yourself.

 

Cry- it's okay not to be okay. Cry when you need to. It's the best release. And again DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP OVER IT!

 

Know you're not alone- Although you feel totally alone and in a world of your own. One in four people suffer with their mental health. And that is people of all ages. But just know that regardless of your situation, even if you are a social butterfly you can feel lonely. It's not about being alone it's that feeling of emptyness. I know that doesn't help much but knowing that there is a reason behind what you're feeling and it's not just you. Physically be in the company of people you know as much as you feel you can. People that will understand. The more you can be in some company the easier it will get.

 

Get help where possible- cooking, shopping etc. The more you can share the load the less pressure is on your shoulders.

 

Shop online- Christmas means busy shops. If you are struggling with social anxiety shopping can be particularly difficult. I remember how hard it was to set foot in supermarkets as I used to feel so trapped. So take away those stresses with internet shopping. You're in an environment where you feel safe and because you're not thinking as much about what your head is saying you have more concentration.

 

Keep your plans simple- feeling stressed and as though you need to be everywhere and everything all at once, will only overwhelm you even more. Keep your plans simple and manageable. You need to be a little selfish and prioritize your own needs and give yourself time to heel. Just because your condition is not visible does not mean it's any less real. If you don't feel up to cooking a complete Christmas dinner nor can you handle being around extended family, consider going out for your Christmas dinner. Treat yourself as well as getting rid of some of the pressure. Evaluate what Christmas means to you and identify simple ways to achieve this. If you are seeing a counsellor or your doctor talk through ways to cut out stressful situations surrounding Christmas.

 

Stay away from social media- seeing what everyone else is up to (bragging about) while you feel so bad will only make you feel worse. So edit how much you go onto social media. If you want to talk to friends/ family do so via phone/text.

 

Write lists- when your mind is all jumbled and yet you still have so much to organize write it all down. Also ticking it off as you do them will also make you feel like you have achieved something.

If at anytime you feel overwhelmed or things get too stressful, whether that be anxiety or others having a Christmas squabble, take yourself off somewhere quiet and regain your composure. Do some breathing excercises. Listen to guided meditation or soothing music. Or put in your headphones and switch off the world for a little while; until you feel okay enough to rejoin. 

 

Watch comedies/ lighthearted programmes- and avoid the sop if you are feeling broken hearted- avoid soaps and the news with their tear jerker headlines. These things can also be hard to follow if your head is feeling over the place. Put on your favourite comedian or funny film and even if you can't laugh just know that you have made a good effort to make yourself feel better.

 

Craft/ Make handmade gifts- Or decorations. Doing craft activities in general can be a good distraction technique and focuses your thoughts rather than have then wander and run amock. For people you want to thank for helping you to cope a handmade gift can mean a lot to both of you. One, because you have made something unique and personal to that personal and two because it will make you feel as though you have done something worthwhile. Sometimes spreading a bit of happiness will bring you some happiness too.

 

Get yourself a gift- go on! You really do deserve it!

 

Pamper yourself- Sometimes just making an effort with our appearance can have a positive effect on our emotions. And again it's about making an effort. So run yourself a bath. Put on a face mask. Experiment with some make up.

 

Wear a nice outfif- for the same reason as above.

 

For everything you do achieve give yourself a pat on the back- don't focus on what you haven't done but what you have.

 

 

To friends and family

 

 

Patience is a virtue- they are not going to snap themselves out of it and at times they may snap or get angry. All you can do is be there. I know it will be frustrating. At any stage they will need you but they will only come to you or say they need your help in their own time.

 

Know that it's not personal

 

Just be there- you will feel at a loss for what to do or what to say but the best thing you can do is be there when they need you. LISTEN. Don't judge or dismiss their feelings. Know that it will have taken a lot for them to open up.

 

Do some research- If you think (or know) that a friend or family member is struggling and you want to help them there is plenty of information available online. I have included some links at the end of this post. Or again you should be able to pick up information from your doctors surgery.

Throughout January I am going to be posting about mental health issues regularly. If there is any issues or areas of mental health you would like to see a post about then please leave a comment.

 

Please visit the following links for additional information and help.

 

Www.mind.org.uk

 

infoline 0300 123 3393

or text 86463

or email info@mind.org.uk

For their Christmas opening times visit www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/

 

Www.samaritans.org

contact them on 08457 90 90 90

or email jo@samaritans.org

 

Www.time-to-change.org.uk

 

Sian x